A few days ago, I unwittingly chanced upon an awfully disturbing scene. It happened on Friday, after my weekly tuition lesson, my parents had brought me to watch a disturbing thriller/horror movie called “1408″. Dang! That was one heck of a freak-ass movie, extremely suspenseful and it made me leave the cinema shuddering with legs like jelly. My tolerance for horror and the paranormal is depressing. Enough about that! The real scene takes place after that lengthy piece of a sordid movie ends.
As I attempted to stagger out of the cinema, a pudgy, teary-eyed youth caught my eye. He stood lonesome in an isolated corner, sobbing his already swollen eyes out amidst the lively chatter of cinema-goers. He appeared to be about 11 or 12, on the brink of turning into a full-fledged teen.
I glanced gloomily at his chubby hand as it rubbed over his face violently to wipe away the endless stream of fat tears. Unexpectedly, a stab of nostalgia hit me squarely in the face and I felt myself cringe uncomfortably.
It is difficult to pinpoint what emotion I was actually experiencing at that moment; there were so many fighting for space in my already cluttered mind. I was glad because that scene had triggered a reminiscence of my childhood; it triggered an emotion that I had not felt in years that I almost became oblivious to its existance in my past. I was feeling upset for the boy because I could relate to his dismal and pathetic position at the time; it was not that long ago that I would have been in his shoes, undergoing a similar situation.
Before you jump into conclusions about my frivolousness, allow me to add that there were other factors that drove me to this assumption. The boy was accompanied by a plump matronly-looking working woman, whom I assumed to be his mother, and 2 other slightly older, taller and skinnier boys, whom I guessed to be his reluctant cousins who only came on this cinema-going outing because they wanted to see the movie, not to socialise with their pudgy cousin. Their apparant iciness towards their cousin told me so.
Immediately, I could deduce the relationship among these family members. The pudgy boy was probably physically slower compared to his lean cousins and the brunt of hurtful jokes due to his size, yet he admired them and yearned longingly to play with them all the time. At this moment I can visualise them rejecting him and disallowing him to join in their private games giving the sad excuse that he was too fat or something, leaving the poor victim to slink miserably into a corner, evidently wounded by their harsh snub, and burst out into a flurry of tears like a wimp as he had done so many times before. The mother of the poor child would always encourage fellowship between the cousins and he by inviting them on excitingly irresistable family excursions to fancy places.
I visualized a handful of the excursions to be somewhat of a success whereby the boy would be included in the activities of the older ones and he would return home with a cheerful grin spread across his face, clearly looking forward the next occasion he could meet up with his cousins. On other more unlucky days he would recieve unreasonable rejection and that would hurt his poor heart that would cause him to question himself relentlessly on what he did wrong. Sometimes they would even make this boy do embarrassing stunts or their dirty work in order for him to join in their activities. In other words, he was fiercely under the control of the cousins whom he looked up to and admired so much.
I sympathized with the boy and I felt heartbroken to see another like me. A feeling of injustice rose up in me and I could feel my face grow red. Evidently I am upset for him. Then I realised that we don’t have to be under the mercy of others, being who they want us to be or doing the things they want us to do for their “acceptance”; it would just foolish to tie one’s self-worth to the whims and fancies of other human beings. I am sure that every one has great potential to be far above what anyone thinks they are capable of doing or what others make them out to be. Everyone will be great if only they have a stong belief, confidence and trust in themselves and take the right steps to achieving their ambition. It only takes one small but very important decision.
I hope that boy will rise above the odds and all the harsh judgement that have come his way to be someone brimming with an unwavering confidence and firm belief in himself to do wondrous things that he can be proud of. I wish him all the best from the bottom of my heart.
