today was a hor…

today was a horrible day. 

I was supposed to give my testimony at MLM but failed to because I was having a heated discussion about studying with my mom. Apparently my studying method is not good enough because my grades don’t seem to show it. For some reason, I became hysterical over the phone and started crying. So not the right time to have swollen eyes and a blocked nose. So I cancelled my sharing. I hope it wasn’t obvious that I wasn’t there. 

the sore mood pretty much carried on into the afternoon. Good thing Kat and Marcus were there to comfort me. Others, well… I guess they didn’t know what to say to me. I hate this sore mood. Reminds me of those hopeless days I had in secondary school. When I used to wonder what was wrong with me and fantasized about being popular.

these feelings are stupid. I want to let go right now.  

Dear God,
I’m up early this morning because I’ve been rudely awoken by this dream that’s been replying in my head over and over. I really hate this kind of drama.

Also to prepare for my sharing today. it came to me last night after my revelation that I should give instead of waiting to be given to. Strange how events from early this year link till now. It’s important to know anyway.

A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. (proverbs 15:1)

If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat; if he is thirsty, give him water to drink.
In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head, and the LORD will reward you. (proverbs 25: 21-22)

These were the verses that came to mind. I thought of sharing what happened with my project group mates earlier this year. We had a misunderstanding with the groupings for the final project. 2 of my group members and I  they were hopping mad at me because they thought I had betrayed them. For 2 whole days I figuring out how to make peace with them but when it came to the moment of confrontation, I froze and couldn’t say anything.

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Another day, another notebook…

I made another notebook this morning with the inspiration of “straight through the heart.” I am not sure if the idea really showed but it turned out way better than I expected; I was afraid the layout would be too plain. Then again, interesting prints really helps to liven things up and… Ta-daa here is my creation!

After looking at it closely, I reckoned that I should start designing my own print as well; it could bring more originality and personality into my notebooks. If only I could figure out how to work the software… Does anybody out there know??

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masquerade!

A little something I bought for myself over the weekend. Prowling around the shops in Ghim Moh, I chanced across this gorgeous mask in a party store (: amidst all colourful ben 10 and winx club stationary and water bottles, I found this gem! It cost $3.60

Being a sucker for atas and sophisticated steals, I decided to pick this mask up and make it part of my random collection of unusual objects at home. I am not going to wear it out to any halloween party… (no one invited me, not even to the my ang moh neighbour’s kids halloween party) God forbid a day where I walk down the street wearing this mask;  I’d much rather buy a red wig to look like Hayley Williams. No, I shan’t be intentionally attention seeking. I think I’ll hang it on my wall or smth as part of my room re-decoration scheme (:

Here’s a really cute notebook that Nigel gave me for my birthday! It says believe it or not in the front .  Can you see the circular pattern in the centre of it? Do the lines look circular or straight?

here’s a picture of it up close. It still looks circular right?

I’ve placed my ruler in the middle of it. Does my ruler look curved or what? haha

here’s an up close picture of my ruler against the patter. The lines look straight now don’t they? My guess is that the position of the white squares on the checkered pattern creates the illusion of roundness. This is coolness at its best

"according to research, the most productive workday is Tuesday and the least productive day is Friday"

Inside the book, there are silly fun facts written at the bottom of each page. I particularly like the one in the caption above, we should just spend tuesday studying and the rest of the days going out

here’s the illustration that accompany’s that super cute fun fact!

It has other trivia like “the owl is the only creature capable of turning its head in a complete circle” and “more monopoly money is printed in a year than real money printed throughout the world!” All of them with cool pictures too

I’m so amused at my present, I can’t believe Nigel got this book for me. It’s so perfect! I don’t know when I’d start writing in it though because I have started and half-used so many notebooks already… ):

My notebook cover creation phase isn’t going to end anytime soon. I learnt a new term in psych called sublimation that I was incredibly intrigued by. It means to “divert or modify (an instinctual impulse) into a culturally higher or socially more acceptable.” Having been rather emotional and restless lately, I have been channelling my energy into creating notebook covers! It’s perfect because I get my angst out of me, don’t unnecessarily burst out at anyone and my awesome friends get to keep my creations. I don’t know if the last advantage is a good thing for my friends, they might end up distancing themselves from me to not receive my notebooks haha

Plans for the weekend:
Nothing really crazy ahead. I have to really reorganise my room and redecorate it! Im getting tired of the pictures I put up last year and replace them with new ones. It’s due time (:

Can’t wait for tmr! MEGAMIND wheeeeee <3

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music journal

One of the assignments our awesome MUS113 teacher Dr. Sam Wong gave to us was to write a music journal! Basically, we have to write about whatever inspires us in music. It’s pretty flexible and we can do practically anything we want in it (:

I love freedom, especially freedom of expression, and so this assignment is totally my cup of tea.  I have many opinions and theories about music which I gladly jot down into this “happy” print notebook that I made on a lonely day.

Because I like to see myself as androgynous, I don’t usually go for floral prints in my notebook designs but this pattern really stood out to me. Maybe it was the floral print on the turquoise blue background that won me over! I used to love blue a lot. In primary 4, I had a blue “hello kitty” pencil case, a blue “looney toons” school bag, blue Bubbles notebook, wore lots of blue clothes… So much that my mom banned me from buying anymore blue clothes because she said that I looked like I was perpetually in mourning. (at that time, my kind of blue was the deep russian blue) Now, my taste in blue objects has evolved into liking the lovely light coloured azure blue; it has really grown on me and I stay true to my androgynous self-image at the same time. It’s girly but not too girly I suppose.

I wish I could have done more with my notebook. Actually, I was thinking of adding gold sequins to the sides or adding more texture… Having just started out, I suppose I need to experiment more with different types of materials! However, $$$ is always an issue. I never have enough money to try out the cool different kinds of materials that I see in scrapbooking stores ): I’ve seen ribbons, stamps with intricate designs, cut-out hole punchers, stick-on glass stamps… There are so many pretty pretty things in there! Pity I can’t try them all out ): So I try to make do with what my student’s budget can afford: interesting prints and ribbons. Even though my designs seem really plain, I make do with the stuff that I have and try to make an interesting twist to them. Isn’t that what innovation is all about? haha

During an inter-class challenge in AC, my friend phu and I teamed up to play contract bridge against another class. At that time, I hadn’t played bridge for months since PAE! I went into the game feeling really confident, thinking that I was going to whip everyone’s butt; my cards weren’t so bad either haha! Okay… so things didn’t really turn out the way I planned it to be. Even though phu and I had the upper hand, we lost. I think it was because I was being too cocky and didn’t play my awesome cards right, and also because the girl and guy on the other side could strategise a lot better than we could. So game over lah! After that, I swore to always play my cards right! (haha how’s that for a pun?) Perhaps it’s not always about the resources that we have, but about what we do with it that makes the whole difference. Becoming successful has a lot to do with how we play our cards! (that could be the reason why not so good looking guys have absolutely smoking hot girlfriends! or the fact that our leaders might not always be the most capable or talented among us… )

Lessons learnt while playing bridge and making notebooks… haha I love my life indeed <3

Excuse me while I make my next entry into my music notebook (MJ for short haha)

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Revival

 

creation <3

A little something I created while watching project runway. Recently, I discovered that one of the best things in life is taking a feeling/emotion and translating that into art! Sculptures, paintings, music, designs etc… seem to express the condition of the human heart more so than words can say; creating a work of art is theraputic and has an element of carthasis to me. This is probably why I am delving into the unfamiliar waters of the art world and taking my chances of finding myself, and maybe some peace, there as well.

After impulsively posting a picture of my creation onto facebook on wednesday night and receiving a ton of (albiet after requesting) comments on it, I feel very encouraged to carry on making these notebook covers! My hobby has always been a something that I’ve kept to myself but I feel that it’s time to come out of my shell and let others see what I love to do.  Art should be appreciated/critiqued right?

Art is growing on me <3